Emotional Resilience — 7 Ways to Gain Emotional Resilience

3 min readSep 30, 2020

Adversities are bound to occur. And in this journey called life, we will face challenges and setbacks. Our approach and response to them determine whether we will be able to bounce back or not. It becomes important that one gains emotional resilience.

Gaining emotional resilience enables us to better cope with the setbacks and challenges of life. A story goes about the carrot, egg, and coffee beans. They were all put into a pot of water and left to boil. After which they were removed and observed. The carrots turned softer, the egg became hard and the coffee changed the water.

What does this little experiment mean?

Each of them had been subjected to the same type of adversity however, they reacted differently. The carrot though strong prior became softened after encountering the boiling water. The egg had been fragile but after going through the boiling water, became hardened. The coffee bean on the other hand actually changed the hot water.

How emotionally resilient are you? How do you bounce back from adversity?

1. Stability

Stable people are tough and persevere; they are not easily tossed by the wind. You have to develop the ability to not waver in the face of challenges. This takes a lot of maturity and constancy of purpose. Your level of stability is directly proportional to your level of emotional resilience.

2. Self-awareness

You have to be aware of the facts of your reality. But self-awareness does not mean talking down on oneself or merely accepting defeat due to hardship. It is being aware of one’s weaknesses, flaws, and insecurities and decided to confront them.

The first thing to do is to say the right things to yourself. Positive affirmations and declarations go a long way in helping us gain resilience. So instead of saying “I can’t”, you want to say “yes I can”. Making these simple switches in how we speak to ourselves changes our response to challenges.

3. Self-care

Learn to prioritize self-care. Self-care doesn’t always have to be luxurious and expensive. Of course, if you can afford a vacation, spa treatment, or a manicure appointment, it won’t be a bad idea. However, focusing on the basics like sleep, healthy eating, and exercise will suffice. Several types of research have revealed that good sleeping habits alongside exercise can increase our ability to effectively cope with stress and ultimately, challenges.

4. Commitment

Stay committed to your goals, values, and purpose. You do this by setting achievable, time-based goals, and staying committed to achieving them. Never losing sight of the big picture in mind.

5. Build strong relationships

It is important that we have a solid support system to fall back to when we are faced with difficult times. No man is an island; we all need a shoulder to lean on when in our dark times. The more real friends you have, the happier and more resilient you are wrought to be.

6. Be flexible

Be aware that things change and be ready to adapt and bounce back when they do. When we are able to adjust readily to different conditions, we’ll be able to snap back without breaking.

7. Stay optimistic

Adopt a more optimistic outlook on situations. See the silver lining in every situation. If for some reason, for instance, you were denied a promotion you deserve to get, you want to tell yourself that something better is on its way rather than beat yourself with a conviction that it is the end of the world.

When next life hits you with a blow of tribulations, remember your approach matters and it is possible to bounce back. Gaining emotional resilience is therefore requisite in our ability to bounce back and stand taller than problems and challenges we face.

Originally published at https://medium.com on September 30, 2020.




Disrupt DNA is a creative agency in Lagos Nigeria. We help brands find and tell the best stories. (www.disruptdna.com)